well damn.......i thought it was over.

Yesterday i went to have my cervex frozen.......nobody even bothered to tell me it would hurt that bad........Gee Thanks.

they said my HPV was already turning cancerous but it was only the first stages.....

so they think they got it......in 6 months ill go back for a re-evaluation and then in another 6 months ill go back again.....if nothing shows up within the next year then im home free.....

however.....

if it comes back theyll try freezing again if that fails again then bye-bye motherhood....well....

ya i guess so.......besides even if i did want one now Jacob Allan would tell me no......

"your going to be somebody if i have to push you the whole way" he says

he doesnt want me to end up like my mother and he wants me to follow my dreams no matter where they take me and he says hell follow......

but.......to never have kids? i dont think i could.......thats something ive wanted ever since i got a hold of my beautiful niece Keke.......shes beautiful shes amazing its almost as if there will never be another like her shes special in every way and Brittany(kekes momma my gurlie)never takes a moment for grantet(SP?) and i want that with MY baby

gawd i probably should be on the Jerry Springer Show but screw it

ive always said if i can never have kids ill adopt so.......

damn i dont know..........

forever

^_^Michelle^_^