wel school sucks but im passing i think my best class is Psychology but its kewl ummmm its great to hear from you guys my life is kinda hitting a rut and i think as more time passes what friends i do have are starting to understand the reality in all this and one in particular has been crying a bit and theres nothing i can really say ya know i mean i try to comfort her but shes really started to understand that all of this is real so i dont know what to say.......its hurts me that shes hurting for no reason........and i try to tell her that we can only go one day at a time........and since all this ive learned to take it slow and thank god every day that i wake up everyday i sit up in bed turn off my alarm clock and i say "god even though today will probably be a shitty day.......thanks for letting me wake up and enjoy it" everyday i say the same thing and my ob-gyn has kinda knocked some since into me he said 'i only drink by the sunsets cause i figure God likes sunsets......i dont go to church often cause i figure god doesnt like all the hipocrits in em  but when i lay down at night i say god its been a hard day and thanks for letting me wake to see it but now its time for me to go to bed so im going to leave you in charge while i sleep.....so watch over me.." hes a smart man atleast in my eyes and what he told me kinda made since he said we all just need to let god take control........well i used to be very religious or atleast i tried......but jr high school hit nd i figured god didnt have time to listen to me so i quit talking.......now i still dont go to church as often as i should but i do make time to talk to god.......is that one of those to little to late type of things where people know there dying so they try to get right with god.......but i dont know if im dying so does it still make me bad?.......am i just like everyone else?.........i dont know but i know i try like hell to not be.....just please keep me in your thoughts and ill be back soon......

*~*Michell*~*